Anal cream pie and lube kink

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Sorry in advance for the way I explain things it might come across weird in the at I say things.

I (M) have a kink where i want to be came inside of. My boyfriend is trans so I don’t have the penis to be able to be came inside of. He pegs me but I really want the feeling of being came inside of. I’ve heard of squirting dildos but I’m afraid that it won’t be like the real thing and that the lube wouldn’t feel like real cum. I’m sorta ok with it not feeling super real but I really want a warm thick and creamy like substitute. Does anybody have any advice or experience with the realism of a squirting dildo and/or the type of fake cum I could use.

Side topic so I don’t have to make two posts. I have another kink where I want to be filled with cum. I’d allow lube as a substitute but I want to leak cum or lube after being pegged or after dildo use. Does anybody know the maximum safe amount of lube I can put in myself? Advice on how to achieve this would also be welcome.

Sorry if I’m weird for this or if I came across inappropriate, I’m still new to how the subreddit works but I want to be courteous.

Anything helps thank you for those who respond🙏.

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