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It really screwed me up, I saw sex as something that shouldn’t be permitted outside of marriage, furthermore lusting over someone was a similar sin. Being a teenager, i felt a lot of shame/guilt because I equated having a crush as “lusting” over someone. i literally imagined me and my crush holding hands and kissing, literally the most PG stuff; I felt shame.
Watching porn also added to those negative feelings. I couldn’t win. That’s terrible feeling for 11 yrs old to carry.
I withdrew from the church because I felt like an impostor. Also, my social circle in school and out disappeared because the large majority were LDS, therefore I felt uncomfortable because convos usually revolved around church activities.
I fell into a deep depression because i didn’t belong, other factors contributed as well.
How do you deal with shame regarding sex, and feeling like you don’t have the social skills to initiate a relationship?
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