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I am a female, i currently live with my boyfriend. We’ve been in the same school since middle school and we got close and we’re best friends once 2019. Last October we started dating after being Friends with Benefits for about 3 months. At the beginning of our relationship which started in October i wasn’t so paranoid or insane like i like to call myself. Over the last few months, i’ve figured out his pattern in how i know he is masturbating. Figuring that out, i used his ipad to see what he was watching from his phone and i confirmed he was watching porn and masturbating. When i told him about my vibrate he called it his competition and wasn’t a fan of me using it and i didn’t have one in our house. The first time i noticed the porn and the masturbating i was mad and didn’t say anything. This isn’t new information to me that he masturbates but it bothers me more and more each time. I spoke up about how i feel and he basically laughed saying it’s just a stress reliever and has nothing to do with me. But he will lie and say he’s gonna go poop and then i see his pants are all full of cum or that he’s super quiet. Just many things that confirm what he is doing. He sneaks around to do it. I know it shouldn’t bother me and it’s normal man/woman behavior a lot of people masturbate and in my past relationships it’s never bothered me and i don’t understand why it does now. I feel these feelings are super unhealthy for my relationship and i’m going to ruin this for us. But it’s feelings i can’t shake off and any time he goes to the bathroom im worried he’s doing it. When we talk about it we just get super defensive. Any advice?? How can i shake this feeling off?? Masturbate after he does doesn’t help.
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