How do y’all know your sexuality?

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Cis male here Like I am attracted to both men and women and do masturbate to both. But I have never had sex and honestly don’t want to have it with either gender. But I’m also hideous and don’t think I deserve love or a relationship so I don’t know if it is that I don’t want a relationship or I don’t think I deserve a relationship.

I have been in one online relationship and the most we did was mutual masterbation on webcam, which was great but I didn’t actually want to fuck her although I let her think that because I knew it made her happy.

I have also been asked out by both men and women and awkwardly deny since I truly don’t want a real life relationship

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