[ad_1]
My boyfriend (26m) and I (24f) have been together nearly a year.
Back in November, I found out that he was saving pictures of women he personally knows to his phone and jerking off to them. He’s gone so far as to offer payment to women he knows for nudes.
He even claimed to hate one of my friends, then used a fake account to stalk her and masturbate to her (non-sexual) photos.
I set a boundary very early on that this was creepy and I wasn’t really okay with porn use in relationships, as it’s negatively affected every one that I’ve been in.
I’ve had him delete secret social accounts that he was using strictly to stalk women he knows AND for porn, but he’ll just make a new one and not tell me.
This is affecting our relationship as we really never have sex anymore (MAYBE once a week when we used to have it 4-6 times a week). Even when we do, it’ll take him an hour or more to finish if he doesn’t go soft by then.
Of course I’m insecure about this, but he insists I wouldn’t be “pushing him away with my insecurities if I’d never been nosy enough to find these things out”. He says I shouldn’t worry, though, because “he’d never go out and actually sleep with anyone” and he doesn’t think our sexual intimacy should matter this much to me. He insists he loves and cares about me, and that he is attracted to me, but I don’t see it anymore. I just feel like a turn-off.
What should I do? What can I change?
Also: last night he was scrolling through his photo gallery next to me and when he scrolled down, I briefly saw a photo of a woman in a bikini. I asked wtf that was, he locked his phone and set it to the side panicked. I kept asking who it was, he REFUSES to tell me. He won’t talk to me today. He wants me to move on from it. I really think it was a woman I know, but it’s hard telling when he’s dead silent. He’s got photos of god knows who, and it’s been 2 weeks since he’s even touched me. But thinks sex shouldn’t matter to me.
[ad_2]
View Reddit by Flaky-Bar-8105 – View Source